We say of Jenny that she wants chocolate, wants a diamond necklace, wants a goldfish, and wants Orlando Bloom. These are concrete objects and not states of affairs. Why should we translate our talk of desiring these objects to talk of desiring particular states of affairs? These cases may even seem more basic than the cases in which we desire states of affairs – after all, desires for food, sex, and simple possessions, often thought of as particularly basic cases, often are described as desires for objects. But there are good reasons to translate this object-talk into states-of-affairs talk. If we stay with object-talk, we will fail to understand exactly what Jenny will try to obtain and be pleased by. Jenny will try to eat chocolate, wear a diamond necklace, keep a goldfish in her aquarium, and make love to Orlando Bloom. She will not try to wear chocolate, eat a diamond necklace, make love to a goldfish, or keep Orlando Bloom in her aquarium. Object-talk is merely a convenient shorthand for states-of-affairs talk. It leaves out the essential differences between the ways we wish to interact with the objects, while states-of-affairs talk specifies this clearly. (Part of why it seems so natural to us may have to do with the way desire directs attention. If Orlando Bloom enters Jenny’s environment, her desire will cause her to focus her attention on him and not other objects in the area, since he is the thing that is most powerfully associated with her desires. However, when she plans future courses of action, her mind will be directed more towards possible states of affairs where she makes love to Orlando Bloom than possibilities where she keeps him in her aquarium.)
So, not an especially funny chapter, but I do what I can. I'm hoping that Orlando Bloom is a reasonable choice for the lusted-after-man role -- feedback, ladies?
On a more philosophical note, I don't know anybody who has actually defended the objects view in print, though it's a response I occasionally get from people. So I thought it was worth responding to.